Help Wanted

I ask for help

I ask for exactly what I need

When I need it

The way I need it

I need help.

Take turns: scolding the need, mocking the need, ignoring the need.

 

The need grows even when ignored. Especially when ignored.

Feed me, Seymour, the need demands

The need grows larger, rounder, hungrier, louder.

The need distracts digests dissects decimates

 

It can’t have more than ten

I must have the other ninety

I have kids to feed, need.

 

You don’t get more than you deserve

No one does

You get what anyone gets, Bernie.*

Exactly what they deserve.

Nothing more or less or even or odd.

Just what you deserve.

I deserve.

Just desserts.

Pie à la mode.

But I’d like the pie heated, and I don’t want the ice cream on top. I want it on the side, and I’d like strawberry instead of vanilla if you have it. If not, then no ice cream, just whipped cream, but only if it’s real. If it’s out of the can, then nothing.**

 No, need. You cannot out-high-maintenance me. You don’t deserve it.

______________________________________________________________________________________

Copyright 2017 Shannon Cooper

*Quote from The Sandman graphic novel, Neil Gaiman, author.

**Quote from When Harry Met Sally, film. Nora Ephron, writer

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Save Me

Save me break me need me lead me

You cannot see my eyes

You cannot see my cries

You cannot see these ties

 

Love me take me beat me reap me

You will not hear more lies

You will not hear more cries

You will not hear us fly

 

Trust me hear me see me feel me

I cannot share my fears

I cannot share my jeers

I cannot map these final steps of we three buccaneers

 

My map is hidden from you

Too profound for you to dig

 

This plan I cannot give you

Can’t believe you will forgive

 

My mind the tornado

Coordinates are lost

 

Directions to and fro are only

Obtained at my long cost

 

These open grounds a fireplace

Gas stove open floor plan ours

 

But I can’t give it up because

To you, not real, but sour

 

I can’t give you myself, my own self

To thine own be true

I’m making progress but til I land

Edinburgh due

I cast my lot, my chance, my heart

To my dear love I’m true

But please hear me see me feel me

My own love, all us, for you.

copyright 2017 Shannon Cooper

ETA: I received a heap of derision and criticism on this piece when it was first published. In response, I deleted it. Then I thought, nah, fuck that, nobody gets to tell ME what and how I write. Anway. Hope you enjoyed that tiny backstory.

Bish Heads

Super excited for the release of a new collection of short horror, Dirty Leaves, later this week! Until then, friends, enjoy this commentary on internet personalities.

Sung to the tune of Fish Heads

Fish heads, dish heads

Red and blueish wish heads

Eat lead, you’re dead

Eat them up, yum!

In the morning, flashy, dashy fish heads

In the evening, floating in her soup

One fish, two fish,

Pouting just for you, fish,

Bobbin up, bobbin down

Flashing for the goons

Have a conversation with a fish head

Shut it down with nothing to lose

Fishy, fleshy, no sense in their dish heads

Aiming in the barrel

Shakalaka BOOM!

Snapper, tapper, she’ll turn down for loose change

Trapper, capper,

She’ll turn up for booze

Fish heads, dish heads

Molly dolly bish heads

Begging for an offer

What you got to lose?

Easy, peasy, no sense in her g-string

Twirly, flurry, undercurrent run

Cheap trick, fleet trick, only one trick paycheck

One backseat ride

Eat’er up, yum!

On screen, tail swing, nothing else to see here

You get what you give here

Bottled answers

Algorithm done!

 

 

Left Behind Again

 

Left behind again

Latchkey child again

Straighten up, straighten out

You’re not fit to find again

 

Less than, lower than, not up to par

White trash, trailer rash, bondo car

Steal my cash, keep your rash

You never needed me far

Should’ve left that door ajar

 

Every woman wants to be the one

His eyes can’t leave, or be undone

His leader not his feeder not his breeder oh no

His lover and his cover and reader oh no

 

But I was left behind again

A latchkey child again

Open door, another whore

A twist in the turnstyle again

 

I was left behind again

Lost in the noise again

Not worth leaving home for

No Air bnb in Rome for

Just left behind again

 

Better when I’m high

Lesser when I’m dry

Jimi Janis Scott Weiland

Let behind again

Nothing to find again

Copyright 2017 Shannon Cooper